all for now

all i can say is i wish i felt better. a lot better. i feel so betrayed by my mind and body right now. all i want to do is rest and not even think about thinking what's wrong with me- which by the way- the GI dr said it's probably anxiety. So now two drs have said that and i guess as of RIGHT NOW that makes sense- b/c yes I am anxious because I don't know why I can't eat and my throat feels so closed and swallowing is so hard and why I feel like there is something in my throat. I'm seeing another GI dr next thursday mainly b/c I feel like the one I saw the other day blew me off b/c I'm "20 so nothing can be wrong with me." I wake up each day saying "it's going to be a good day today- finally." but somehow it isn't and it hasn't been since last saturday.

well that's all for now.